Why be gay?

This blog explains my views of homosexuality based strictly on a scientific and psychological perspective.

Monday, March 05, 2007

The first post will be the last

The intention of writing this blog was to show my views of homosexuality based strictly on a scientific and psychological perspective so that people could know about them. My job here is done and I'm gone.

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

How homosexuality is an abuse, denigration, discrimination, perversion and sexual compulsion

Having sex without the intention for procreation is already blind pleasure seeking. Some people have said that the intention to have sex with their (girl/boy) friends is to strengthen their bonds together. But surely there are other ways besides having sex to form a closer bond to people?

Does this mean that people who have sex make the strongest bonds, and those who don't make weaker bonds? Well the kind of bonds are in question, whether they are bonds for trust, love or just a bond for physical intimacy and lust?

From dictionary.com, the meaning of perversion is, "the action of perverting something (turning it to a wrong use); "it was a perversion of justice".(I chose the most subtle meaning).

So the definition of perversion is to turn a function into a wrong use. It is to misuse and abuse an object or person.

Having sex with the opposite sex without procreation is already a perversion, a misuse of the sex organs for blind pleasure. Having "sex" with the same gender would make it more perversive than opposite gender sex.

So homosexual sex is more perversive than heterosexual sex. Paedophilia sex would thus be even more perversive than same age homosexual sex.

Misusing of the sex organs is already a perversion, so homosexuality is infact a perversion. And perversions are caused by psychological disorders. They are disorders of failing to recognise the true functions of objects or people. This makes homosexual and heterosexual people who misuse their organs as having psychological disorders.

This blog's focus is on homosexuality as a perversion because it is more perversive than heterosexual non-procreation sex, and because same genders cannot possibly perform sexual intercourse in the technical sense. They misuse a non-sexual part of the body for "sex", this already fits the definition of perversion, which is the misusing of a body part for "sex". And this "sex" is a false sex without the possibility of procreation.

So homosexuals are not only being perverted, they are also being false. There are more truthful ways of forming trust, closer relationships and bonds with other people besides putting a part of oneself into the body of another while having the brain stimulated for pleasure. It is just misusing other people's bodies for pleasure. But is the function of people's bodies for the pleasuring of oneself? This is to disrespect another human being and to treat them as mere pleasure machines.

Men already disrespect women when they see women as pleasure servants, when men view the same of other men, they are disrespecting their own kind. This makes homosexuality more perversive than heterosexuality non-procreation sex.

Many men who already view women as sex objects are already practising a bad discrimination and desrespecting women's rights, and when homosexuals view men as sex objects, they are being worse than the men who desrespect women, because they desrespect their own gender and children of their own gender as well.

If men disrespect their own and view their own as sex objects, how disrespectful and degenerative is this? It is the same as your own family disrespecting you. It is a betrayal of the respect of the same gender. This is why many people distrust homosexuals and don't like to be physically close to them because people feel their intentions are not respectful and questionable. How does one know whether they are just friendly or are flirting themselves?

Many heterosexuals mix with their opposite gender homosexuals friends because they realise that their opposite gender homosexual friends would not try to hit on them, as opposite gender heterosexuals might do. On the other hand, heterosexuals would not feel safe with same gender homosexuals because they feel the same distrust as they feel towards the opposite gender, but they would be more wary and cautious.

People who cannot abstain themselves from sex are having sexual compulsive disorder and a disorder is a psychological problem. They have the need to continually misuse another person's body for their perversion. I have already mentioned in an earlier blog post as to why people have sex. They want sex to fulfill their needs for security, trust, comfort, pleasure, intimacy, distraction from threats etc Until homosexuals can find what they require from sex from other proper avenues, as well as abstain themselves from sex, they would always be deemed as suffering from sexual perversion and sexual compulsive disorder, both which are psychological disorders.

Homosexuality should not be promoted because it is a psychological problem

Refer to my earlier posts for my explanations of why Homosexuality is a psychological problem. If it is a psychological problem then why should a psychological problem be promoted?

Thursday, February 22, 2007

The reasons why most people do not like homosexuals

In many societies in the world, most people do not like homosexuals. They often view them with disgust and discrimination. But some people including homosexuals then accuse the dislikers as being ignorant and homophobic. But what are the dislikers being ignorant about is the question. Perhaps homosexuals feel that people are being ignorant of their rights to do things as they please.

Many homosexuals do not show respect for other people in society in many things that they do publicly, which are activities that could be seen as offensive to others. This could be the reason why homosexuals are seen as extreme pleasure seekers who often prioritise physical pleasure-seeking than other common needs, this could brand them as self-centered immoral people.

Homosexuals being vocal and loud in advocating for their rights would not help to convince people to change their minds because is is not possible to change society into accepting degenerative people and their activities. They should be discreet in their acts instead of going against common norms. It is futile trying to convince the majority that denegenerative activities should be commonly accepted.

Moreover, people have come to view homosexuals as degenerative people who often go after rich materialistic lifestyles, going after nice superficial things in life like fashion, food, entertainment and physical pleasure. Society therefore does not view homosexuals as good role models.

Many extreme homosexuals are the ones who give homosexuality the bad name. They are the paedophiles who molest and seek sexual pleasure from young children, the ones who seek sexual pleasure without protection which leads to the spreading of Aids, and the ones who perform offensive acts in public etc

Most people in society thus cannot accept homosexuals. The unacceptance is complicated when homosexuals rely on their emotional abstract language rather than simple logical thought in communicating their ideas to others, leading to misunderstandings. Their poor communication skills and volatile nature thus gets in the way of their desire to be understood by others.

Most people in society often feel that there is nothing much to understand about homosexuals anyway, since they are a group of emotional and pleasure-seeking people who are quite unusual in their thoughts and communicate in abstract languages and terms. What is there really to be liked about homosexuals? Can anyone state some reasons for them to be liked?

I do not care what homosexuals do with their own lives as long as they do not promote their bad behaviour with misleading social behaviours and false concepts of happiness and freedom, nor torment people with their criminal behaviour such as the homosexual molesters, rapists and paedophiles. If homosexuals continue to state that homosexuality is not a psychological problem, this blog will always be here to explain otherwise.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

I was harassed today by a terrorist of human rights

I really dislike writing this entry.

Today, I was at a bus stop waiting for a bus to arrive. I was standing deside a pole at the left corner of the bus stop. Then a man came up and stood at the other end of the pole. At the corner of my eye, I saw that he was staring at me from the other side of the pole. I was slightly irritated by the stare and positioned myself so that the pole would block me away from his further stares.

A few minutes went by. All the while I had this feeling that I was continually being stared at, a great uneasiness as though something bad was going to happen to me. Then as I turned my head to look around, I noticed that the man who was staring at me was now standing right at my left! And when I turned my head to look at him, he immediately turned his head to his left to avoid any eye contact.

I was totally freaked out at how he managed to sneak up close to me, and how he reacted when I turned my head to look at him. I immediately changed my position and walked to the middle of the bus stop where there were people sitting down to have more safety. Throughout my remaining waiting time, I kept an eye on him to make sure he did not try to sneek up on my position again.

The most frightening thing was that he did not get on the incoming bus, where all the buses go on the same route and end up at the Bus Interchange. Maybe he could be waiting for someone to pick him up, but why did he avoid me when I turned my head to look at him, and why did he kept on staring at me in the first place? In order for him to know when I was turning my head and to avoid my glance at the same time, he definitely had to be looking at me to be aware of which direction I was focusing on. Was his reflex a sign of mischief or guilt?

Did the man have a motive on me? It's really frightening to wonder what was going on in his mind, what he could have wanted to do to me. Whatever it was, I felt I was harassed, I felt sneaked up upon, I felt surprise, I felt disgust, I felt fear, I felt a lost of control, I felt a little depressed and I felt anger. There were so many types of emotions in me because of that incident that took place in a matter of minutes.

The man's physical characteristics are:
Middle age
With a fat belly
Smart casual with a shirt and trousers
About 1.7m in height

I think I am really beginning to develop some sort of a fear of a stereotype I am conjuring in my mind. I don't know whether the man was straight or homosexual. I don't know what he is, what his motives were. Was he trying to irritate me? What was he trying to do to me?

If I would to encounter the same situation again, I would call the police and get the "terrorist" arrested for harrassment or for further investigations. I hope that would not be necessary.

I am not lying when I say I have read encounters on blogs where school-going boys were molested in the bus and MRT by men who fit my listed description of the man I encountered. The men were all middle-aged and well-dressed. Reading about molest cases was the main reason I included the topic of paedophilia in my blog. The news also mentioned of Singaporean men who went overseas to third-world countries to have sex with underaged children including boys. I think those boys were sold by their parents into prostitution. They have to do something miserable against their will for the rest of their lives. Then supposed civilised men from our country would go and torment these children.

(MP Dr Amy Khor of Hong Kah GRC, I have the utmost respect for what you have done to implement laws against paedophilia, and what you have also done in other areas, and how you stood up in parliament to bring forth your points. With people like you in parliament, Singapore would have real hope.)

I have already written that I think why middle-aged men molest young boys was because they want to reconnect with younger boys because of their desirable qualities and innocence, to express out their liking in a physical way, but in a very, very self-centered way.

Some people like homosexuals have expressed disdain for my views on homosexuality, how I discourage it and why it should not be promoted. But had these people take time from their pleasure-seeking and realised what is going on in other countries and experienced what I felt today, would they understand the way I view homosexuals?

Was what I experienced today due to the immaturity of Singapore's society? I felt a great climate of fear and disappointment for some of Singapore's citizens today, some of them are still too immature, too pleasure-seeking, too concerned with themselves with little left to care about people's existence around them, to care about other's feelings. I am considering whether I should leave this place to avoid further of such hazards in the future? Should I finally prepare for migration after receiving this last straw? Should I leave for a more suitable and mature society in another country where their people show more respect and human rights for other people?

For all the things I fear most in life, the most fear I get is from realising that there are people in society who seek things for themselves without any conscience for the people around them, not even a hint of concern, not even a trace of respect for people. These people with cold hearts are walking among us threatening the basic human rights of other people, looking for their next victims. The great fear and concern this creates in me of the other people vulnerable to such ravenous terrorists among us.

I don't know what homosexuals would feel after reading this entry, would they think that I deserve this frightening experience because of my views on this blog? Would they further insult and victimise the victim who has spoken out? Like how they brand people who expressed disdain of homosexuality as victims of abuse by homosexuals? Maybe they will gloat and feel a sense of victory I don't really care. Are they too concerned with their pleasure-seeking to feel some sympathy? I am too tired of this homosexuality issue in society. What a horrible world I have been born into. The real world is so much different from its appearances.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

The psychological problem of Homosexuality

Homosexuality is actually a simple psychological problem prevalent in many societies. However the recognition of Homosexuality as a serious psychological problem that requires counselling and therapy is often strongly impeded by its very own denial as a serious psychological problem.

The reason for denying Homosexuality as a psychological problem lies with individuals who cannot accept their own mistakes and adopt self-preservation measures to shift responsibility.

The causes for a person to take on homosexuality are varied and diverse, as different people are affected differently by different nature and nurture aspects of life.

Some common causes of homosexuality are due to factors in family upbringing such as deficient parental or poor fatherly skills. Many homosexuals are brought up with deficient adult male identities caused by lack of interactions with good male adults. The lack of positive male adult role-modelling would later cause them to be seen as effeminate males when they grow up.

Many homosexuals are also confused by the meaning of homosexuality, believing in hearsays that promote homosexuality as a way to express love for another similar gender person. However the inclusion of sexual practises in homosexuality would deem the propagation of its many love-sharing values to be a false claim and a great lie.

Many homosexuals believe that physical intimacy is a showing of love for another same-gender person. However at this point, intuitive and reasonable people would question the true notions of love. What does the word love really mean? Is love simply an expression of one's liking for another person? Homosexuals have yet to provide a legitible explanation for their perception of love, this which would deem their definition of Homosexuality as a way of showing love to be unsubstantiated and even a well made-believed fantasy and fallacy.

The many fantasies that predominate Homosexuality as a blissful way of life clearly demonstrate homosexuals' escapism and denial mentality for the unpleasants and imperfections of life. The need of these mentalities are led by problems and difficulties in their lives that traps and suppresses their need for self-expression and re-connecting with other people. The need for one to be heard and re-connection would later be resolved by a person adopting Homosexuality as a way for self-expression. The repressed need for self-expression could later be observed as exaggerated behaviour demonstrated by homosexuals.

Another group of homosexuals that do not have such exaggerated behaviour are often mistaken as heterosexual-behaving. Such homosexuals do not have a great need for self-expression but see same-gender sexual practises as an effective way to re-connect with other males, to re-connect with the desirable male identities. Such a strong distraction while being attracted to other desirable males would prove to be an effective distraction for their segregation from these same-gender people who exhibit such desirable male identities. It is plain desire manifesting in different forms.

Many homosexuals' great escapism while going after males who exhibit their desired male characteristics would often block out important factors to be considered. Many promiscuous homosexuals often misplace important judgement such as taking sexual precautions. This could lead to the epidemic of sexual diseases that could claim lives. It is a sorry state of self-sacrifice by giving up one's body and life to seek another. This is one of many examples of Homosexuality exhibiting serious failure in mental judgement which would deem it as a serious psychological problem that would require therapy.

The acceptance of Homosexuality as a psychological problem is further impeded by homosexuals' denial of it as a problem, and to recognise themselves as performers of the problem.

Many psychologists worldwide do not agree with the view of the American Psychological Association that Homosexuality is not a psychological problem. Homosexuals like to refer to the APA to defend their own views of Homosexuality. However the APA's argument of their diagnosis of Homosexuality is not a conclusive one to convince many psychologists from their doubts.

Many homosexuals have listed some studies done on Homosexuality to justify its practice and to claim for further human rights such as same-gender marriages and adoptions. Studies have been done in the west such as some homophobes' reactions to homosexual pornography and some homosexuals' reactions to same-gender pheromones. However such studies are not conclusive enough to prove rare anomalies as widespread occurences, and to prove Homosexuality as a positive occurence of life. But simply demonstrating the existence of rare, naturally occuring phenomenon are not sufficient to deem anomalies as widespread non-problems.

From an objective perspective of the studies done, one could also conclude the studies as the demonstration of naturally occuring problems of nature, such as the demonstration of rare but naturally occuring anomalies such as Cancer. However even the common flu is naturally occuring.

So how does one deem an occurence between natural and a physical or psychological anomaly? The main factor that differentiate between the both lies in the presence of physical or psychological painful discomforts.

Homosexuals clearly demonstrate the presence of psychological discomforts such as their past repression of self-expression, segregation due to poor communication skills and loneliness. Homosexuals would later try to resolve these discomforts and anomalies by adopting Homosexuality as a way of life. But would Homosexuality actually resolve the initial communication problems that lead to Homosexuality?

The effectiveness of Homosexuality can only be seen in the way how homosexuals are understood by others, and whether they can bring their points across to other people. But often, the lack of effective communication skills, logical thinking, self-centeredness and emotional behaviours would get in the way of effective discourse with other people.

The denial, escapism and blame-shifting mentality of homosexuals also sees them putting blame on their parents who refuse to accept their child as homosexual, that their parents are also required to "come out" and accept their child as homosexual. However, the reluctance of parents to accept parental failure and their poor or deficient communication skills with their homosexual child is a good evidence that poor parenting skills is a main factor of Homosexuality. Many parents of homosexuals are often divorced or not on good talking terms with each other. Such families clearly demonstrate the poor and deficient communication skills that could lead to homosexuals' poor communication skills.

Poor and deficient parenting skills are also factors to a person seeking Homosexuality. The lack of parenting skills that teaches a child that expressions of love is not only demonstrated from physical intimacy alone but also through many other ways to show concern and love. That the true meaning of love is to perceive a fellow person as one perceives oneself, this is the true meaning of love as from the Bible and what the spirit of Christmas is about.

People who fail to recognise what love really is and how to express it effectively to others might turn to Homosexuality as a distorted means to resolve their repressed need for self-expression, to resolve their poor communication skills in order to connect effectively with people, and to curb their segregation from people so as to resolve their immense loneliness from the lack of effective love expression.

Paedophiles who are homosexuals might be trying to obsessively reconnect to young children, through physical touch alone. They fail to utlise other forms of communication in order to express their liking for young children.

The failure to resolve the true meaning of love, its poor expression and poor communication skills would only spread and worsens. Homosexuality is not an effective way to resolve poor communication skills, expression of love and loneliness. The way to resolve Homosexuality is to firstly remove the denial of it as a real psychological problem, and to find alternative ways to resolve the initial problems of poor communication skills, expressions of love and loneliness. Only when a problem is truly recognised for what it is can people begin to resolve themselves.

P.S. I believe I have listed the main points of the simple problems of Homosexuality therefore there may not be further posts on this blog. For my intended audience of this blog, I hope they being the discerning and understanding few, would be able to discern the information in this blog, put its knowledge into practice and lead a life worth leading. I may not be dealing with the problem of Homosexuality any further as it is not a very pleasant problem to think about.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

Homosexuality and Politics: why homosexuality culture should not be encouraged

There are many reasons why Homosexuality culture should not be encouraged from being demonstrated in public. One of the reasons is that it supports a main characteristic of Homosexuality as rightful.

Talking about Homosexuality is different from talking about Religion, where Religion promotes the betterment of people, Homosexuality does not promote betterment in the character of a person, it mainly promotes freedom of expression and behaviour.

Homosexuals would argue that homosexuality is about "love" etc, but I wonder what their definition of love really is. What love really means to me, is to care and understand another person as if he/she is you. The earliest well-known definition of love is from the Bible, where it says to love your neighbour as you love yourself. It says to love a neighbour, who could be someone that one is not related to. Therefore the only logical meaning of love could only mean care, compassion and understanding for a fellow human being.

If homosexuality is not about compassion, then what could it be about? I have stated in previous blog posts that Homosexuality is a behaviour that people could use in order to distract them from their unwanted loneliness in life and as a distraction from many of their life's problems, similar as people who drink, take drugs or in other pleasure activities to distract their minds off things.

Homosexuality could even be used by people to free themselves from being trapped in a limiting dull kind of life, where they feel little personal freedom of expression. Therefore homosexuality could be seen by them to be liberating for their trapped expression of thoughts and behaviours.

However, not all thoughts and behaviour is respectful towards other people in a society, such as criminal behaviour and disrespectful thoughts.

If Homosexuality behaviour is to be decriminalised, it would sent a clear signal that the main characteristic behaviour of Homosexuality, which is same-gender sexual acts, would also be decriminalised across the board. This would then send a signal that other criminal acts such as underaged child sexual abuse and paedophilia would also be decriminalised and encouraged. Homosexuality, whether consensual or not, would then be seen as a legitimate outlet to free a person from his/her problems of trapped expression and sad loneliness.

Homosexuals should remember that what they are promoting of Homosexuality, doesn't only affect them but also many other groups of people. If homosexuals really feel that being gay is about love, then consider the consequences of how promoting the freedom of homosexuality could be misused by sex criminals, they could use it as an excuse to justify anything they do to other people.

Freedom of behaviour and expression has many levels. If there really are care, compassion and understanding for neighbours, then recognise what else homosexual activism could be legitimising in society as well. There are many ways for personal expression to be freed, but it cannot come at a huge price of encouraging criminal acts at the expense of other people in society.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Wee Shu Min private home video exposed!!!

"I beg your pardon!! We are gods!!"

Full video part 1
Full video part 2

Oh my goddess! Ms Wee Shu Min is not only a blogger/social critic/bikini model/comic character/internet idol, she's also an actress playing a goddess! Watch out Gayle Goh, she's going to steal your ricebowl!

In the video she plays Cacia/Kakia. According to Greek mythology, "Kakia was the female Daimon (Spirit) of vice and moral badness. She was depicted as a vain, plump and heavily made-up woman dressed in revealing clothes."

I guess the god complex role suits her very well although we have heard what they say of money and power being intoxicating. Maybe she recently got too engrossed in her acting roles with real-life. I say her acting in the video is truly get-in-your-face terrific.

Just a few comments on the whole Derek Wee vs Wee Shu Min fiasco because so few bloggers wrote about it from a fair and bigger point of view.

I agree with the main points of what Wee Shu Min said on her removed blog in reply to Derek Wee's posting in his blog, although her tone and choice of words is regrettable even if she was just writing to herself. Maybe her frustration had something to do with hormones? She probably just got fed up with many of the middle-age blog whiners in Singapore. Wee Shu Min is a Minister's daughter studying in the top JC, of course she is more or less intelligent and resourceful enough to know and understand the social climate in Singapore.

Derek Wee was talking about the work struggles of ageism and discrimination in Multi National Corporations(MNCs) which is within the private sector. This is out of the scope of the government to influence. If Derek Wee worries of his livelihood, he would have more luck in securing a solid ricebowl if he starts his own business or work in the public sector.

So the points put forth by Wee Shu Min are valid.

It was wrong for many people to link the MRT suicides to elites like WSM because sometimes the desperately poor people are under-educated and cannot adapt in society. Sometimes people are poor not because they are losing in the rat race, or encountered an unfortunate incident or sickness that depleted alot of life savings. Sometimes these people or their family members have gotten into bad habits like excessive shopping, drinking or gambling, that causes one to spend more than one earns, in order to get into a desperate state of poverty trap. So no amount of money from progress packages could help such poor families unless they are willing to change their living attitude with psychological counselling, then they can be taught to catch their own fish instead of depending on donations from the government all the time. Until this common worldwide situation can be resolved, the poor will definitely get poorer and the rich will definitely get richer.

Many bloggers have targeted Wee Shu Min's father, her JC, her youth, her social class and even go so low as to target her physical attributes. They have also accused the Rich and Elite people like Wee Shu Min of being uncompassionate towards people of the lower class. This is just what blog whiners are really good at doing, failing to see the bigger pictures and instead complaining and whining at every easy target they set their eyes on. They even fail or refuse to recognise that the statement Wee Shu Min made, "get out of my elite uncaring face", is a sarcastic remark made in frustration.

But if the Poor cannot understand how the Rich live their lives, do not expect all of the Rich to understand how the Poor live their lives as well. It is not everyone's obligation to be compassionate towards everything.

So what Wee Shu Min said in her blog or how she said them, is really just her own private business(as how her father put it) and part of her own freedom of speech on the Internet. If internet bloggers wish to lambast every other person for saying things they do not agree with, then they are pot-calling-the-kettle-black contradicting hypocrites who demand free speech in Singapore but ever so failing to recognise and promote it when they have the chance, and instead gang up and terrorise other bloggers with their own abused freedom of speech.

They should be very shameful of their own actions, especially those bloggers who wrote negative things about Wee Shu Min and targeted her associations just so they could go with the flow of the majority and increase the number of visitors to their sites. They have clearly demonstrated their plain lack of intelligence, reason and civil morals.

It is indeed true when one of our MPs said the blogosphere in Singapore is still generally immature.

Complaining when one has set oneself in a poverty trap is not only myopic and unreasonable, it will not improve the situation. Some things are reasonable enough to voice complains and some things are just plainly out of point. I guess this was the point that Wee Shu Min really made in her sarcastic and frustrated reply towards Derek Wee's complains that were seemingly out of point.

Come on, what do people expect to find in an 18 yr old girl's diary about her own private life and personal ramblings? Not everyone thinks like Saint Jesus. And not everyone wishes to be constantly judged by one's associations.

Wee Shu Min is an MP's daughter, she's rich, elite and study at the top JC in Singapore. So what? Her obligation is to feed the poor? She's also like every other 18 yr old human being with emotions, not a scapegoat nor a convenient target for angsty people who dislike the government.

If a blogger posts alot of personal information, it doesn't mean other people can take the personal information and use it against the blogger. Sometimes teenage bloggers just want to ramble as a form of cathartic release from their lives and not put up a false front just because of where she studies or who her father is. And then people want to hijack this opening and use it for their own agendas with abused freedom of speech?

Who takes seriously every word of an 18 yr old student's private thoughts in her blog? It just shows how tyrant, selfish, despicable, backward and sick some adult Singaporean bloggers are. I am laughing and mocking at these people's comments so is Wee Shu Min. They should learn from their own silly mistake.

The private life of a blogger is just that, private. Private details of bloggers should be respected and not be picked out and showcased to every busybody on the Net. This is what privacy and a private blog means. This is common civil sense that every civilised person practises.

Does Wee Shu Min have to blog like the MPs from p65.sg? And is there honestly a need for a right of reply for a teenager's frustrated musings on her blog? Get real and look in the right direction.

No sane and intelligent person honestly seeks politically correct speech from a teenager venting her frustrations on her blog. I know I don't. I don't even care who her father is. Doing that is not only looking in the wrong direction, it's also insanely stupid.

I guess Wee Shu Min thought likewise but I guess Singaporeans and their calibre are full of surprises. This also goes out to the crackpot low grade 'fine' teachers who censor their students' blogs. I guess that is such encouraging role model behaviour for others to follow.

It is the very same people who continue to associate Wee Shu Min with her father, that are the ones who practise shameless worship of social connections and discrimination to an obnoxious level.

Wee Shu Min and her minister father are human beings like every other Singaporean, they certainly are not supernatural religious figures without flaws, so why should they wear hypocrite masks just to pacify every whining critic of the government?

This whole fiasco should not even happen, it only makes Singaporean bloggers look volatile and stupid.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

What men really want...from other men

Homosexuality is caused by a lack of sufficient positive male identity, along with the desiring for the positive male identity from other men creates homosexual desires.

Homosexual men look at men differently from other men. When they look at an attractive man, what they see is related to their desired characteristics of the male identity. They want these missing male identities maybe because they lack it themselves and find it fascinating, or because they already have it and just want to mingle with other men who also share similar attributes.

When homosexual men see a handsome, sporty and muscular tanned male, with nice rich hair, these to most men, would form the epitome of the perfect male identity, they immediately feel at ease with such a person. Their mental defences to ward off unwanted threats is lowered, along with the emergence of their desires for the attributes of such a guy.

They could see such a guy as "hot" and "sexy" without realising the underlying reasons that causes such emotions to emerge.

My previous blog posts have mentioned many factors that lead to homosexual desires. And also contributing factors that bring such desires to surface, in order that one could use homosexual desires to escape from the problems of reality.

So different types of homosexuals such as the feminine or straight-acting types, could have different reasons that cause them to have homosexual desires.

The feminine types of homosexuals could feel that men with strong sense of the male identity are interesting and fascinating. And the straight-acting types could feel that other straight-acting types are similar to themselves and would be a compatible partner to be with.

So, what do homosexual men really see in other men?

Maybe in the example of a "hot" and "sexy" mascular tanned guy, they would subconsciously perceive the attributes of the strong male identity such as Strength, Courage, Health and Beauty. All these ingredients would mix together to deem a guy as "hot" and "sexy".

The attributes of a strong male identity are indeed desirable for many men. But the main difference between the pursue of these attributes would deem homosexual men different from straight or other types of men.

Homosexual men usually just want the superficial attributes of the desirable male identity. Many homosexual men go for Beauty primarily. And straight men who pursue the desirable male identity usually go for Strength, Courage, Health and sometimes Beauty.

There are many attributes of the male identity but how men go after these attributes would deem them to be vastly different from one another.

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Homosexuality is caused by poor fatherly skills

I'm sure we have heard that homosexuality is caused by the neglect of either one or both parents of their child. And there was that old accusation that males become homosexuals because they spend too much time with their mothers therefore they would turn girly, think like one and become homosexuals.

This is actually an incomplete hypothesis.

One of the main causes of homosexuality is caused by the neglect of a young child's social ability to connect with people since young, specifically the gender of his own. And when the child gets older, his suppressed needs to connect with people in order to remove his feelings of loneliness and mental isolation would spur into ways in which to express his suppressed feelings and he would seek ways to connect with people, mentally or physically.

If a young child is neglected from either of his parents since young, he would miss out on the early years of connecting with the closest people to him. He would miss out on the opportunities to closely connect mentally with the female or male gender people that are closest to him.

We have heard of many kids whose parent or both parents are both busy working and have no time for them. Sometimes it is only the female maid that is around the child most of the time. This situation would present a problem.

Even though the young child may have siblings or have the chance to interact with other children such as cousins or kids at nurseries, the adults who have the maturity and trained social skills to interact with the child are usually the females. There is a great absence of adult males who could interact with the young child and familiarise him with the adult male identity through male-to-male interactions.

So throughout the child's early years, he would experience deficient interactions with the adult males.

Now that answers how the Sensitive New Age Guy(SNAG) could possibly come into being.

Male children who experience deficient opportunities to bond with male adults may later have their supressed needs turn into curiosity of the same gender, which may lead them to believe they are homosexuals because they find the male identity very fascinating and relevent to themselves.

The male parent of the child is most responsible and capable of bonding with his child. The other schoolmates that are of the same age as the child at school are still at a very young age and they lack the skills for effective same gender bonding and connection. The male teachers in school are not as close to his male students as a father could be to his son.

So if the father could not impart the skills of same gender bonding with his son, the child would very much be left on his own to learn about the adult male identity. He would be left to depend on his seniors at school to become his brotherly figures to impart skills of same gender bonding to help him learn and develop his own male identity.

But sometimes we find young male adolescents or teenagers to be too busy doing their own thing rather than to impart or learn the skills of connecting with their same genders. They are too busy getting in touch with the latest music or computer games rather than to get in touch mentally with their male peers and the male identity.

So the child may still find himself distant from the adult male identity but his desires to get in touch with it is still present and growing.

If one day he comes across the concept of Homosexuality which seems to him as an effective way of "male bonding" with other males, he may see himself fitting and desiring to be a homosexual without knowing what he is getting himself into.

He may think that connecting to others physically is an effective way to connect with them mentally in order to get in touch with the male identities of others and his own.

So the desiring and seeking remains until one day he finds what he is really looking for, which is the male identity of himself.

We can tell that many homosexuals do not have a very complete adult male identity because they often show signs of childlike behaviour and emotions, their expression of their male identity does not seem very complete and mature.

We have also heard that many homosexuals are afraid or even find it very difficult to disclose their homosexuality to their parents, especially their fathers. This is a sign of either or both side's deficient social skills to connect and communicate with people effectively.

If parents cannot communicate well with their son, how would they be able to teach him the male and female identities?

Actually a homosexual outing himself to his father is actually a way of the son telling his father that he needs to connect with the adult male identity by spending time with other males by being a homosexual.

Of course the father would feel left out, sad, betrayed, guilty and doubts his own male identity and parenting skills because his son chooses to be more intimate with other guys rather than with his old man.

It seems like a very logical cause and effect consequence. Because fathers could not impart their adult male identity to their sons, their sons choose to seek it from other males, through different ways, even through others' pants.

Friday, September 15, 2006

Why people want to have sex

People have sex sometimes to bridge a connection with other people. They do that when they feel distant from people and they want to use physical sex as an effective distraction from their unwanted effects from mental isolation and loneliness.

People who often change sexual partners do so to gain new connections as they get bored after a prolonged relationship with a person. If such people are constantly using sexual connections to connect with others, they are doing so because of a deficient ability to connect with people in non-sexual ways.

Sometimes they don't really judge who their sexual partners are, as long as they are able to have a physical sexual connection. This is prevalent in blind one-night-stands where people have "fast love". People who practises one-night-stands are probably seen as fulfilling their "physical need quota" to connect, they just have the pressing need to connect. This is also often known as lust, sexual desires or sexual libido. They also want new people to connect with as they get easily tired of people's bodies. But it is like treating people's bodies as objects, like new clothes that one wears everyday.

Why do people need to connect mentally or physically with other people?

They do so because it is a nice comforting experience especially with the people that they like. Connecting to people gives one support and strength for survival. It also gives one motivation energy to deal with life's difficulties. It is also a wonderful distraction for unpleasant negative thoughts. Talking to friends or going out with them are good examples of human connections.

Being in love actually means to achieve a mental connection with a person. So it is normal to love people whether they are of the same gender or not.

Loving people is fine but using people's bodies to attempt to connect with them shows signs of problems.

A deficient ability to connect mentally with people will only lead to further problems. If a person cannot connect well with others, it could lead to many misunderstandings and problems.

If a person can connect well mentally with others, there is no need for physical sexual connections. And having sex would be left for the original purpose of procreation.

People who have plenty of sex only reveals a deficient ability to connect mentally with people. They are certaintly not role models to follow.

This is why society often feels that homosexuals who practises sexual promiscuity are not doing the right thing. Gay parties and spas that promotes physical sexual connections are often disapproved for this subconscious reason in people's minds. They feel that it is not right but can't find the reason to explain it.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Homosexuality lies in a connection problem

This is an update of the factors that leads to homosexuality. I will refer from previous blog posts.

A young boy who does not have a good environment that allows him sufficient opportunities to connect and relate to the people around him would not gain the skills to socially relate to people when he grows up.

The young boy with his deficient social skills, would find it uneasy to communicate well with people and make friends. Deficient social skills can be seen in kids who could not connect well with their peers, even though they may talk alot but often talk out of topic. This may cause him to be neglected by his peers.

The young boy's need to connect with people is then suppressed until he grows up much later. His needs to connect with people may then develop into likings and crushes of his favourite peers. Some homosexuals realise their liking for other boys at a young age.

As the boy reaches puberty, his body changes and he could develop intense crushes on boys of his age. He may even develop sexual thoughts and fantasies of his crushes.

But the boy may still experience his deficient ability to communicate and to connect with people. His needs to connect with people may then turn into his sexual fantasies during masturbation in which he imagines close physical connections with his crushes. The boy may feel that it is the only possible way to connect with these people because he is unable to communicate and connect to them in real-life, he may be afraid to approach them to chat and to make friends, due to various reasons that instill nervousness in him.

As the boy grows up into a teenager, his needs to express himself may develop into other areas such as dressing and body language. He may even dye his hair and follow the many habits of his peers such as hanging out in streets and smoking, which does not improve one's social skills but dulls it.

Some homosexual teenagers who hang out with groups of friends may be able to talk fluently and may seem very expressive but very often the topics they talk about cannot be related or relevant to other people. They may be good in self-expression but poor in people-connecting skills. They often talk for the sake of relieving boredom instead of connecting with people. Teenagers who cannot connect well with their parents would often lead to misunderstandings and family quarrels.

Homosexual teenagers feel the great need to connect to another person and to share thoughts and feelings. They may get influenced by the social culture of Homosexuality, and they adopt themselves as homosexuals.

Homosexuals choose the same gender to relate to because they are more similar to themselves than the opposite gender, and therefore easier to connect with. They prefer the same gender as a more effective solace for their daily worries and threats to their Selves.

To be able to love requires one to connect to others with the mind. Homosexuals who are unable to do so due to deficient social skills may use physical sexual connections in order to connect with the person they like. But having a physical connection with another person does not mean he could know and understand the person through such a temporary connection. It takes time and patience to get to know a person well and to develop trust.

Homosexuals may see sexual behaviours as extreme forms of play. But animals who lack efficient ways to communicate with one another use physical body language and touch as a form to connect and communicate.

We see physical world wars where the failure to communicate and understand leads to physical fights. So is sexual behaviour a sign of the failure to communicate, which has to be resolved through touch and motion to release repressed emotions?

How well do people understand homosexuals even though they are so expressive? There is a great communication barrier.

Homosexuals may seem to be very expressive but their erratic emotions and impatience often get in the way in the face of logical reasoning. They often go out of point.

Homosexuals often find attractive people as safe and easily connectable people. But whether they could successfully make friends with them is another matter.

Homosexuals who seek to have long term boyfriends may just want a long term connection with a person. They just want to focus connecting with a person instead of many close friends.

Homosexuals often break up easily with their boyfriends because of the inability to maintain a long-term connection, due to deficient social skills or incompatible personalities. If two people cannot connect properly, there would definately be misunderstandings. It may be easy to connect physically with people but to connect mentally is not a fast and simple process, social skills has to be worked on.

Homosexuals who seek sexual intimacy to connect with other males may simply be using the connection as a temporary escape and relief from unwanted thoughts in their lives. Of course they could also play computer games and do hobbies for hours but I'm sure people are much more interesting, livelier and more interactive than the inanimate and lonely computer.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Searching the seat of a person's soul

Where does a person's "soul" reside in his body?

It is quite unfortunate that many people don't know where to actually find the person within the person. Where do they find the person within his bodily vessel? How is the soul of a person like? How does it show itself to others? How do others see and feel it?

Two guys hang out together as friends. They go out together and spend time together. Do they really know the other person or are they familiar with just their bodily vessels. How would one of the guys describe his other friend? Would his description be based on exterior appearances or by describing character that has shown through close times spent together?

How does he find and feel his friend within the person sitting beside him? And how does he find and know people even though he can see them right before his eyes?

Very often all of us have eyes that we can't use to see. We can often see things but not always know things as they truly are. What is reality and delusions are often separated by a fine imaginary line. Sometimes we misunderstood one for the other.

How does a guy find his other friend's soul?

Does he look in his friend's pocket? From within his eyes which are said to be windows to a person's soul? Or from his smile? From his voice? From his touch? Or from within his pants, the private and restricted zone?

We look to find a person in different ways and in different places. Sometimes people think that the most private and protected place of a person would lie his soul, his innermost character, personality and identity.

People think that it has to be it, where else can a person's soul be hidden except the most private, protected and restricted zone?

Maybe some people think that they can get to know a person if they gain access to a person's private and restricted place, that they can connect and communicate to the person through that private place.

The private areas of a person are most sensitively connected to the brain with their many nerve endings. Gaining access to a person's private areas is to gain access to a place which is well connected to the brain, it does not mean that one would gain access to a person's soul through the place.

A person may even invite another to gain access to his most private and protected part of his body. But the open invitation does not mean certainty in getting to know the person.

Why would a person allow another person to gain access to his private areas of his body? Maybe he sees the person as a non-threat, like someone close to him. He wants a connection with him.

Gaining access to a person's private areas or even getting a glimpse of it is just a superficial experience. Being able to connect to a person physically in his most private areas does not mean that one would be able to connect to the person so as to know the person.

A person's ability to know another person may have been undeveloped, disabled or suppressed by the many distractions from threats to his mind. Which is why he may feel that connecting to another person physically is the only best and fast way to get to understand and know another person.

His desperation to seek solace from his insecurities may drive himself the need to express himself fully to another person and to understand others through physical touch.

A person's undeveloped, disabled or suppressed mental ability to connect with others may be directed to physical intimacy as a sure path to achieving concern and understanding.

He would come to have sexual desires as an "outing" channel for his need to connect with people and to understand them better.

Is adopting a homosexual sexual lifestyle helpful to develop a person's ability to express himself to others and to understand them better? Or does a person just need to learn how to express himself better to others by getting in touch with his own suppressed feelings and also the feelings of other people?

Having sex with a person would not allow one to get to know well the soul of a person, but perhaps a way to get to know the physical material body better?

So is gaining access to a person's private areas and having sex the way to search for a person's soul or is it a futile and mind-less search just for the physical body?

Getting to know and understand a person is not possible through fast connections of the body. It takes time and patience to seek out a person's soul and to know it.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Breathing this in may seriously affect judgment

Referenced and partly re-edited from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pheromones

"A pheromone is any chemical or set of chemicals produced by a living organism that transmits a message to other members of the same species."

Pheromones are responsible for the synchronization of menstrual cycles among women(McClintock effect).

"Pheromones in humans are postulated to be produced by the apocrine glands. The apocrine glands become functional after reaching puberty which, some believe, could contribute to people developing a sexual attraction for others at that time. Pheromone detection has also been proposed to be the reason why a person can sense "chemistry", or feel an instant attraction or dislike when first meeting someone."

Eccrine and Apocrine are 2 types of the body's sweat glands.

Let us take a look at how tv shows us the effects of the potent chemical with 2 sci-fi programs. They both implies political manipulation.

StarTrek Enterprise episode "Bound"

Stargate Atlantis "Irresistible"

Inhaled pheromones could severly alter mental processes and leave a person easily open to suggestions (such as teenagers who have less experience and knowledge in dealing with such cases) Pheromones could make a person feel "comfortable" and disable a person's threat defense system and judgment. Which means a person affected by pheromones would not keep up the frequency of his reasoning and logical checks as he usually does because he feels "extra safe".

Which means if a person ventures out of his home into public, he could potentially inhale in the pheromones of countless people, as it affects his judgment and reasoning ability. People who have little control over desires would easily fall prey to such chemical influences.

People who are often "unserious" or psychological unstable might even be influenced by their own pheromones and opened to their own suggestions, no matter how illogical and "wacky" it may initially seem to other people, because they perform less comparing checks on their logic because they feel too safe not to.

No wonder so many people hate their domineering nose, they can only like what their nose likes.

When people are in close proximity, their pheromones could play a large part in subconscious mind manipulation. But not to forget pheromones could also make a person dislike someone.

People often wonder why they did something that they later felt they should/would not have done, maybe the answer partly lies in pheromones.

Pheromones could cause a person to hang out with someone, which he would be much better off hanging out with someone else. Certain horoscope signs are more compatible with certain horoscope signs. This is the most accurate horoscope site I have seen. http://www.miltonblack.com.au/compatibility.htm

Pheromones are mind-altering drugs, be very careful of them(especially in hot and humid Singapore, showers would regulate their release).

Be even more careful of the human body, it is a storage of a barrage of chemicals. Anything may trigger a chain of explosive reactions.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Why do grown men want to have sex with young boys?

I recently heard about men who have desires to have sex with young boys on Channelnewsasia's 20/20 program.
Refer to link: http://abcnews.go.com/2020/story?id=1684565&page=1

And North American Man Boy Love Association website:

Oh my God of sanity and common decency...Such things in this world make me want to vomit and commit suicide like Judas...These people have no mind of God...

This is what happens when people misuse their "rights" and "ammendments" for all their little deluded habits worded as their "personal freedom".

Well we heard about men who go to Batam and Dr Amy Khor who spoke about the issue a while ago about imposing laws to prevent such acts from taking place. Thank God Singapore is Singapore and not other countries who blindly allows "freedom of rights" by minority activism groups with deluded agendas.

Why do grown men like the dentist would even think of having sex with young underaged boys?

"The man who shared our life and who shared our children. The man who shared my bed — prefers young boys." -the dentist's ex-wife

The reason I can theorise is because such grown men cannot function and adapt well to their grown-up environment with all the great demands and responsibilities for adults. In their free time, they escape to another world and day-dream of a scenario where they can escape to a moment and a place where they have little worries and fears of the future.

That time and moment to escape to is from their childhood.

They imagine that they were young children again, when their parents did all the worrying about money and food for them, and they were so free to play and dream with other kids, with other kids...

A good example is of the dentist being quite obsessed with toys, toys he could have wanted when he was a young boy. It shows escapism.

A well-known example is Michael Jackson and his Neverland theme park built for kids.

Homosexuals do mention that they realise they were attracted to other young boys when they were kids, and realise their developed sexuality at that young age. So having sex with young boys as opposed to grown up men is a different preference for a different type of sexual partner. Maybe they feel that they can be more of themselves when they were younger, they could escape their old age and be young again, they could become more childlike and escape to a less worrying stage of their lives, if their partner is "younger" and do not even have to give thought to anything, being underaged and cannot decide for themselves even.

This is why paedophiles want their sex partner to be underaged and too young to be consensual for sex, maybe they even want to escape and fantasize about "switching sides", they would become like the underaged boy and the grown men would be like a father or older brother-like figure who can take care of their worrying needs and problems. So temporarily while they have sex with a young boy, they could "switch identities" and escape to the mentality of the young boy and the grown man "behind them" being an older father or brother-like figure who can temporarily offer them relieve from worries and threats and provide distracting "comfort".

As I mentioned that people use sex to distract themselves from their daily worries and escape and relax the mind. Maybe to paedophiles, using young boys would prove to be more effective for them to escape to their childlike mode.

People must realise the source of the problems. As I mention that men play with other men's bodies as physical play for pleasure, which ever age group the males could be in, young boys or adult men.

And then we have heard about principals and teachers of local boys' schools being accused of molestation. The same reasons perhaps, they could just wish that by touching and realising the "feeling" of another man or boy, they could somehow "share" their youthful and childlike innocent quality, they could also temporarily escape to that "moment" when they were young boys again, free of the pressures and worries of adult life, such as job stability, rising costs of living etc.

But they only think of their own needs, hardly the consequences, life-long trauma and damage their acts would do to their innocent victims who would have the rest of their lives to live. Such mindlessly selfish and desperate acts is illegal and immoral, it is a criminal act.

The thought of grown men abusing and molesting young innocent boys feels like making my left and right brains want to switch sides, it makes the earth want to switch poles, in fact it is already switching poles.

Oh my God, such mindless animalistic and corrupted acts in this world gives people great doubt as to existence of life in this world.

NIV 1TH 4:3 It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; 4 that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, 5 not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; 6 and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. 7 For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. 8 Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy Spirit.

Agree or disagree with this post? Any comments as to why grown men want to have sex with young boys? Do contribute.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

The safe and threat qualities

What are the safe and threat qualities that I have been mentioning occasionally in the blog? In this post, I will briefly explain their definitions.

The safe quality of a person or object is a quality that does not pose a threat to the person's identity. It does not corrupt his identity nor induces fear in him. For example a cute teddy bear.

The threat qualities of a person or object is a quality that poses a significant threat to the person's identity and even his survival. It occasionally poses threats and induces fear to the person. An example is a wild monkey.

A person may feel more comfortable with a cute teddy bear than with a wild monkey who has an incompatible personality to his. Therefore he would prefer the company of his teddy bear to the wild monkey at any time.

This is why children who face fears, would absorb themselves in their doll or bear hugs, and would sleep with them as they provide comfort away from their threats and fears of objects or people.

Sometimes a person would feel that a person is handsome and attractive without consciously knowing the reasons for the instinctual attraction. One of the reasons is due to the presence of safe qualities detected by the person's subconscious mind.

The person's subconscious is saying that the attractive person has observable safe and compatible personalities, therefore less likely to pose a threat to his survival, and would not corrupt his identity, therefore would bring forth happiness, therefore a good candidate as a companion for him to like.

The person would deem him to be attractive, charming, easy-going, pleasant etc because he does not pose a significant threat but enholds a sense of security. The same reason why females are attracted to rich but unattractive guys. The rich guys have the quality of finances to alleviate their insecurity(lack of finances) that sometimes would pose a threat(fear) to their survival.

This is similar to what young people, such as the boy who experiences crushes in school, are also going through as well. He could fantasize about the safe and compatible qualities of his crush all day long to fill in his other unwanted thoughts of unsecurity.

A kid would hug a bear to sleep, as the safe and compatible qualities of the bear would fill in his thoughts of fears or uncertainties in his mind that keeps him worried and awake.

The ever crucial self-preservation need to replace and distract away the subconscious feelings of insecurities in the mind of a person, has been the motivation factor for human desire and obsessions, such as being attracted to beautiful people. Along with habits like smoking to relieve "stress", drinking, gaming, sports, shopping, eating, sex, and masturbation etc

They say Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but I would also like to add that Beauty in things or in people, is also defined by how much safe and compatible qualities are present in them.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Why there is promiscuity among people

We know of people who have broken off with their boy or girl friends, and getting to find other new partners. Also of divorced people finding new marriage partners quickly. Friends who break off friendships and finding new friends.

Why do people move on from one person to the other so conveniently? How do they move on so quickly?

This is because of the new found sense of security in the new found person.

We break off our relationships with people we find to be unsuitable for us and we move on and find new companions.

Sometimes the speed and ease of the transition from people to people makes a person seems "unfaithful" and "heartless", whether it is sexual relations or friendships.

The bottom line of the reason why people practise this "promiscuity" is because they are seeking a sense of security in people when they seek out their friends or sexual partners. They want to find that ideal someone who pose the least threats to their identity. Which is why when a person discovers that another person is incompatible in character, he would break off the relationship and find someone else to be his companion.

We are all very familiar with the movie or real-life scenario where a guy breaks off with his partner and then the next following week the partner sees the ex-boyfriend with someone new walking down the street. And then the partner feels depressed at how the ex-boyfriend could move on so quickly and forget about his old relationship so quickly as if it meant nothing to him at all. And the partner broods about the "cold heartlessness" scene and just cannot get over it.

It is the same underlying reason whether it is for friendships, marriage or for people seeking sexual partners. People seek people who are "safe" to them, who poses the least "threat" to their character, who are most compatible in behaviour.

But when they discover the incompatiblity in a person, their self-preservation mechanism in their mind would sabotage the relationship and end it. And then they would move on quickly to find the next ideal person asap. As what my previous posts have mentioned, the reason is because of the never-ending need for a person to seek something or someone that can alleviate the insecurities(threats) in their lives.

The person can choose to have a boyfriend if he feels that a guy can fulfill his own insecurities, or a girlfriend if she can fulfill his insecurities, or even both genders. Bisexuals do not discriminate or be biased by the threat qualities between the genders as much as gays or straights do, which is why they can accomodate both genders.

The person would not be very concerned about his old relationship, whether how long it had lasted or the countless memories associated with it. All he wants is to find the ideal person to alleviate the insecurities(threats) in his mind.

But for the other person who was "dumped", he would not feel the same way, he would think that his ideal person is still his ex, and he is unwilling to let go and find someone new. Just as a dog owner unwilling to get a new dog, or unwilling to get over a person's death.

The problems comes down to using people to distract oneself from one's insecurities(threats) or boredom. Stop treating people as tools to alleviate one's insecurities(threats) and many of the problems would solve itself.

Monday, April 03, 2006

Homosexuality is a very serious psychological problem

The time in this blog has been moving backwards and now it is reversing.

In 1973, Dr Robert Spitzer convinced the American Psychiatric Association (APA) to remove the classification of homosexuality as a "mental illness".

I would say that Dr Spitzer did not do his research well, his study was flawed and now out-dated. He only knows Psychology and Medicine, he doesn't know Cognitive Science which covers much more areas of the psyche.

My work has specified that Homosexuality is a very serious psychological problem instead of a "mental illness", because it is a symptom of the dealing with threats, with fear. Homosexuals choose using sex from its original function of procreation to as a far-fetched "solution" to deal with their fear of their threats. It is a symptom of a very serious psychological problem.

Homosexuals cannot simply change out of this problem. The problem has to be resolved, not changed out of.

Wanting homosexuals to switch orientations is a drastic thought, it is similar to making a person change from using his right hand to his left. He has to learn to live his life all over again. No one has this right to demand anyone to do something like this.

Yes, some homosexuals can stop being homosexuals because their fears that caused them to use sex is mild, their fears can be resolved easily. But if the fears that cause homosexuals to use sex to deal with them is very deep, it is very difficult to change. It depends on individuals' circumstances.

As long as one is too caught up with running away from his fears, he will never be able to realise what he is running away from, and what it is all about. If he does not realise this, how will he be able to see the options, the choices and the changes possible? He must first realise how homosexuality is caused by his fears and what homosexuality is all about.

Then he can slowly change or choose the way he is affected by his fears, if he wants to.

Let us firstly talk about helping homosexuals deal with their threats that make them seek sex as a comfort, and then we'll talk about the other issues later.

Firstly, the APA must list homosexuality as a very serious psychological problem.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Nothing wrong in liking guys

I like guys too. There is nothing wrong in feeling for close buddies and loving them too, love as in my definition of love. I like guys because they are fun to be with, they are also playful, naughty, enjoyable, intelligent, warm, funny and nice. I actually prefer the company of guy buddies to girl friends.

I don't have to censor the things I say and do as much with guys than with girls. Infact I feel more of myself because of our greater similarity and understanding of one another.

The difference between guy friends and homosexuals is that guy friends don't play with each other's bodies to the extent as homosexuals do.

Guys may play physically with one another when they are young, fool around and be a total clown at times.

Actually I see both straight and gay forms of physical play as defined as physical play itself, whichever body parts are involved. Its just that gays play in more extreme forms.

It is not really male to male sex that makes me feel uncomfortable, but it is the unawareness of gays of the reason that led them to choose such extreme forms of body play.

Referring to my previous posts, I mentioned of using neural sensations to get oneself comfort. Also of the reasons why people feel horny and why they have sex. The reasons are all the same, it is using physical comfort to get one to a safe zone away from all the unpleasant thoughts.

Straight guys play physically with one another to relax themselves and have fun, gays play physically with one another using sex to relax themselves to have fun as well.

It is not the notion of sex that makes me uncomfortable with the idea, I am just uncomfortable and worried of gays being too extreme in using sex to find a safe zone to relax themselves from their threats. Many people who have sex are often unconscious of the underlying reasons of why they have the need to have sex in the first place. Many times they are really desperate to get away from the threats. I am quite worried of the level of mental oversight in such people who would do almost anything to seek comfort. And the dangers involved in unprotected sex really puts a damper to the people involved.

I just hope that people who are seeking "sanctuary" from threats would actually understand the cause of why they do it. And that they can find other more effective and efficient ways of seeking "solace" instead of using sex as an ineffective temporary escape. If they cannot realise the reason why they do things, then it is difficult to solve the threat problem.

I just hope that they can see, and also realise there are many, many ways to relax the mind besides the familiar one.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

What does it truly mean to be gay?

This is created because many people especially youngsters do not realise what it truly means to be gay. They are always left confused with nobody to ask for guidance therefore this blog will serve to truly explain what it really means to be gay and the choice to follow this direction or not will ultimately be left to the person to decide. Please be clear that I am not promoting any sexuality, whether straight, gay or asexual, nor trying to do any sexuality conversion. My blog does not imply that if a gay person discontinues being gay, then he definitely has to choose being one of the other sexualities. There are increasingly, many intelligent and well-grounded singles in this advanced age who do not see the crucial need to require a sexual partner in their lives.

Youngsters whether they are males or females, when they have reached puberty, they are faced with dealing with bodily changes. These body changes are caused by the body's chemical reactions of hormones that often affects mental functions as well as physical functions. Therefore during puberty, one is often faced with emotional difficulties along with all the stress and problems that life brings.

I will explain very simply the confusions that some people may face in order for them to feel confusion about their bodies and their desires. And I will also explain the reasons behind these confusions.

A young boy may one day in his life begin to feel that he likes and maybe prefers to be with other boys instead of the opposite gender. He may develop attraction to some or a certain person before or during puberty.

The reason for this attraction is actually a "distraction" for the person. You may wonder what does this means. Actually in life, people do many things to keep their minds occupied. And sometimes people choose to do things or hold thoughts that are more interesting than others that are less interesting and boring.

Everyone has a hobby of great interests to keep themselves away from boredom. (Computer games, sports, hanging out with friends, movies, music are some of the many examples.)

And it is often that if a young adolescent boy develops an interest for one of his peers that reveals this act of distraction.

The young boy may think that he feels strangely attracted to another boy in his school and he feels excited whenever he is with him or sees him. He feels that he likes the boy very much and think many things about the boy. He creates mental models in his mind of scenarios where he is hanging out with him, doing things with him and feeling close with him. These are very common thoughts for many youngsters.

But do you know the real reason that these thoughts occur?

The reason is simple. These thoughts occur because they are a good distraction for the youngster. He can think about the other boy all day long without feeling bored or tired, these thoughts are a great distraction for the boy.

But you may ask, a great distraction for what?

These distractions of a boy thinking about his favorite thoughts of another boy that he likes very much are simply there to distract the mind from other less interesting thoughts. These less interesting thoughts are kept suppressed whenver he thinks about his favorite thought.

The suppressed thoughts are often unwelcomed ones. These might be problems of school, of the family, health, fears, trauma and bad memories of the past and many others that are too many to list here. Actually mankind has been facing many unwanted thoughts such as threats to one's life since he was walking on the earth. He faced many life-threatening threats from ferocious animals aound his environment.

But as early man evolved to deal with those threats, he began to outwit his predators and the threats lessened gradually. His lifestyle also changed into the modern one we experience now. But little threats are still present, they still take the form of threats like maintaining survival, threats to one's identity and threats as problems that prevent one from experiencing personal freedom. Threats are still present and people still have to deal with them whether they like it or not.

The most effective way to deal with threats is to directly remove the source but often people do not have the necessary ways or means to do that. Some ways of dealing with threats are also not legal or totally effective or efficient. So many threats have to be temporarily kept aside, in the corner of the mind, until one finds the best way to remove them.

So the boy is using his forefront most distracting and favorite thought to distract himself from his other unwelcomed threats and to keep them effectively suppressed temporarily. Remember that a distracting thought can be any other thought besides of that of a person. It can also be favorite pleasurable hobbies that many other youngsters like to do as well.

So now let's get back to the boy. The boy is going through a time in his life where his body and mind are going through many changes. And that teenage period is also the most uncertain period of one's life. So he is experiencing puberty in secondary school around secondary 2 onwards.

He thinks to himself that he likes this guy that he has a crush on. Most crushes fade away but some lasts if the attraction is very strong and is also fueled by strong physical reaction to the crush. He feels strange that he feels excited whenever he thinks about his crush. And during puberty, his bodily reaction may get tied-in to some of his thoughts such as his crush.

Sometimes after he wakes up from bed in the morning, he experiences an erection of his penis and he likes that feeling. This bodily feeling feels as great as his feelings of his favorite thoughts. He unconsciously relate his most pleasurable thought along with his favorite bodily sensation, which is his arousal. He groups this nice bodily sensation in the same group as his fantasy.

As he goes on through puberty, he gets to know about his sexual organs and its functions. He also gets to learn about them in his school science textbooks. He may then hear about masturbation and sex from some sexual health people or his friends and classmates. They may expose him to some pornographic videos and they watch about people having sexual intercourse in the videos. He gets fascinated about how after one arouses the penis enough, a flow of yellow or white liquid would eject from the penis.

This really gets his attention and arouses his curiosity very much. He may then think of trying it. And he tries masturbation.

During masturbation, he feels so distracted by all the pleasurable sensations going through his body and his mind. He can think of nothing else except pleasuring himself. All the thoughts in his mind are chosen to be of nice ones that can hold on his masturbation. Naturally or incidentally, he would choose the thoughts of his guy of interest as one of the thoughts that helps him maintain his erection.

He would think about his favorite guy as he masturbates and jerks off. He would feel that he is feeling very relaxed and comfortable and in a very safe state of mind. All his fears and problems are temporarily kept distracted and suppressed.

He would think about his favorite guy and all the things he fantasize doing with him. He may even think of masturbating with that guy in his mind or even still, touching him in his private places, and maybe even having oral or intercourse with him. These sexual thoughts may be influenced by what his friends told him or what he saw in the pornographic gay or straight sex videos. He is only curious and experimenting in his mind some of his thoughts on how they would actually feel to him if they would to happen.

The boy would continue masturbating with the pleasurable thoughts in his mind until the bodily sensations increase to a very high level that he could not hold it any more and he experiences orgasm and ejaculates. The muscle spasms of his penis and groin area during orgasm feels like the most delightful experience he has ever encountered in his life.

It is a great and nice experience to the boy and he feels that he would try it again the next time, when he feels bored or need to feel relax, away from his problems and worries. And this may become a habit in the future.

The male sexual organs would automatically clear itself of the old supply of seminal fluid or sperms about once to a few times a month, through the process of wet dreams. Seminal fluid is constantly being created and renewed in the testicles to create new sperm for procreation.

To prevent messy wet dreams, one has to masturbate about once a week or two to prevent staining one's pants or bed. But most often guys get into the habit of masturbating more often than needed when they use masturbation as a form of pleasure activity.

Going back to the question of a person being confused on whether or not he is gay. The boy may get influenced by the ideas from society and the world around him of the concept of being gay.

The gay culture's idea of being gay is the loving of another same-gender person and having sexual relations like straight people do.

But I have serious doubts on whether straight and gay people actually know the true meaning of Love. Many people define Love as a liking and great mental and physical attraction for another person, that one cannot do without the other.

To me, this definition would only come to me as the definition of Lust. That one likes another person because of a beautiful exterior and the great desire to have physical and mental contact.

This definition also come to me as using a liking and desire as a good distraction to keep one away from his own problems. This is what many people think of love as, whether it is youngsters or the adults.

To me, what Love truly means is to see the world of another person through his own eyes. This way, one would experience the world of another person. He would feel all the problems and happiness of the other person, what are the best things for him and what are not the best things for him as well. This is coincidentally what the Bible says of Love as to "love your neighbour as yourself".

Is there any other definitions of Love that can be greater than this definition? I would like to hear about it.

So the boy got confused by ideals around him and thinks that lusting for another person is equal to loving him. And he thinks that he loves guys if he has a strong physical reaction and attraction for any one of them. He would think he is gay.

But if you would read through all that I have written, you would come to understand that I feel that the definition of being gay is lust pretending as Love. And many people are uncosnciously using lust for others to keep themselves distracted from facing their problems and worries.

And this is what I think being gay actually means to me.

If any readers to this post have any comments or questions about this post or about homosexuality, please leave them in the forum created at http://whybegay.forumsplace.com

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Some of the questions asked

After the first post, many people have asked me questions.

One of the more popular questions is why a guy would choose another guy instead of a girl to think about when he needs a good thought to keep him away from thinking about other things. And also why does he feel so interested and fascinated with another guy specifically rather than a girl. Is his liking controlled by a "gay gene" as another person also told me that this is the case? Is being gay determined by nature or nurture?

The reason is because the guy feels safer with the qualities of a guy instead of a girl. Sometimes humans and early man feel that things that are more similar to them pose less of a threat to changing and corrupting his identity, so there's a larger possibility that its a friend and not foe.

He also feels really fascinated with another guy rather than a girl because he sees another similar gender person that he can more easily read and understand rather than another gender that feels foreign to him. And things that are more familiar to him would have similar characteristics that allows him to decipher its qualities more readily, which could be why he reads and absorbs the same gender person's interesting qualities easier than of that of another opposite gender that is less familiar and qualities less easily readible. So I don't think this is the work of a "gay gene", whether it actually exists or not.

So there are many points to consider,
1. Another same gender guy tells his mind that the other guy is a "safer" person than the girl because of a greater similarity of characteristics.
2. This allows him to open up and decipher the guy's qualities more readily.
3. The similar characteristics of another same gender person allows him to read and decipher his qualities easier and more efficiently.
4. The amount of interesting qualities deciphered of the other guy makes him seem to feel that guys are more interesting and "safer" than girls, which is actually a normal feeling. Of course guys feel more comfortable with guys which is why guys often have guys to hang out more often with instead of girls.
5. Remember that a person would more often discriminate between the safe qualities and threat qualities of different people if he has already been greatly exposed to threats that have harmed his identity before and he feels the need to protect himself from such threats. Which is why he feels the importance and need to be with people that are "safe" to him.

Monday, March 13, 2006

People who become gays because of gays

Some readers have felt that I have left some topics out due to their own personal experiences.

One of the questions asked is, what about the guys who were "physically disturbed" by other guys when they were younger and then later turned gay?

As told to me, a person who was "physically disturbed" when he was younger would feel traumatised by the experience. Then later on, he would develop a mild kind of phobia whenever he gets into "close contact" with other guys because of a barrier already set up by the mind to fend against people in close contact situations that would remind him of his bad experience.

He might distant himself from doing close-contact physical sports that places him in high vulnerability, which makes him develop an isolation from people. He might even get biased and develop a kind of hatred for guys that reminds him of his own bad memories because of this grouping in his mind.

And a while after this, he might develop an intense liking for guys and lead him to think that he is gay.

The question is, why did the guy initially develop a phobia for guys and yet after a short while, also develop an intense liking for guys while still feeling affected by the trauma in his mind which is also caused by the same gender?

The reason I can think of that supports this "paradox" is because the guy is subconsciously using a source of great interest to try to block out and overcome the bad memories in his mind. There was this part in his inner mind where he felt private and open with himself, until this area in his mind was seriously disturbed by the person who gave him the bad experience.

So this private, safe area in his mind was "intruded" by a frightening "stranger". This area in his mind is where all his bad memories come from that often reminds him of his trauma.

But the mind habitually uses a source of great interest to distract other unwanted memories. This is a form of self-preservation of the mind. The guy comes across a source of great interests in the form of other guys that he meets. The great interests in these guys eventually led him to choose them as a form of distraction to overcome the traumatic experiences in his mind.

But the problem is that the bad memories are too strongly etched in his mind and seems to stay on. Therefore he subconsciously tries to heighten the level of interest from the guys that he likes, in order to compete and overthrow the other unwanted memories.

This intense conflict and fight between this two sides is what causing the paradox and frustrating mood-swings encountered.

I would say that this method of using a source of great interest to block and suppressed bad memories in the mind will not eventually work. There is no point running away from a fire that started burning up in the mind, the only way to remove the fire is to extinguish it. Because people are so afraid of terrifying things in life, they simply run away without putting them out. So the fire will remain burning and spread itself, until one day, the person has no where else to run and would have to face what he is initially running and hiding away from.

The first step to putting out such fires is to stop feeling so afraid of them but stop and face them. I don't know when a person would stop running from the fires in his mind. It might take a long time but I can give assurance that once a person stops running and turn and face his fears, by then, it would show that his courage is already standing unaffected against the fire, and it is definite that in no time, the fire will surely cease to burn very soon. And the person would have truly demonstrated to himself that he has overcome.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Why does a person feel horny?

Why does a person feel horny? And why does he lose this interest and then develops it again?

These are questions posed to me.

The feeling of being aroused and feeling horny has very much to do with body chemistry. Similarly to the fact that certain medicines and drugs can change the body chemistry and strongly affect mental judgment.

One of the initial causes of feeling aroused and horny is the changing sodium chloride to water ratio in the brain and body. The brain is the first organ in the body to get dehyrated whenever the fluid levels run low. This will immediately cause the water ratio to lower against the sodium chloride ratio in the mind.

People who are fluent in Chemistry or Biology would be aware that Osmosis plays an important part in the brain and body. Such an example is the imbalance of sodium and potassium ions inside and outside the brain cells that leads to automatic balancing. When the electrical charge of the ions in the cell is imbalance, the correction of this by the ions will lead to the firing of the neuro-transmitters to send information from one part of the brain to another.

When the body and brain is dehydrated of water, the brain contracts. Most often there is a salty taste on the tongue of a dry mouth.

Dehydration would cause the person to feel emotionally erratic at times due to heightened neural impulses in the brain and body.

During early times when man was still very primal, the brain is contracted and the thinking mind would be led to the primal parts of the brain to be reminded of a primal need to find water to relieve the thirst. But in modern times, sometimes when man is reminded of this primal need to sustain himself by the sensations of a dry mouth, he has many things to do and he is often distracted by his other work. So he waits a long while later to drink water because he knows that he can get water when he wants to and has no need to fear for his life.

The contraction of the brain also leads the thinking mind to access other innermost thoughts. Remember that during body dehydration, the body and brain contracts and sensory stimuli travels faster and more intensely, due to a greater electrical conductivity when the sodium chloride level in the body rises.

During these times, brain and body stimulus are heightened. Early on in life, the person might have linked his favorite thoughts to such heightened body and mental states. An example is what the boy in the first blog post could have done when he felt he was in a heightened sensory state of body and mind, and he linked his favorite thought of his crush to his intense body sensations.

So whenever the body and brain experiences dehydration, the mind contracts and retreats to a more primal place in the brain, where the mind is lead to his favorite sensory thoughts. If these are sexual thoughts, he would feel "horny". If these are worrying thoughts, he would feel afraid. An example od a person being dehydrated and has a work deadline to meet, his dehydration would intensify his worrying feelings and cause him to feel fear of not meeting his deadline.

So dehydration does not necessarily leads to a person feeling horny every single time. His present situation would dictate whether it is permissible or suitable for whatever thoughts he allows into his mind, to feel horny because he is thinking sexual thoughts, or to feel worry because he is thinking of his work deadline.

Of course the person has for a long time, developed the habit of putting off the search of water to drink because of all his usual distracting thoughts that is going on in his mind.

The person might choose masturbation to relieve the intensified sexual feelings in his mind. And when he ejaculates and experiences orgasm, the brain and body is filled with a burst of middle to high intensity neural electrical impulses along with a chemical that gives the brain and body a relaxing feeling. This burst of neural electrical impulses is a lower intensity form of the sensations of pain, which is very high intensity. So as to say, the brain emits a burst of high intensity "pain" to bombard and replace the low intensity horny sensations in the brain and body.

It is similar to removing a low intensity sensations of an itch with a mid or high intensity sensations of a scratch, which brings just about the right amount of pain to neutralise the itch. During masturbation, the low intensity sensations in the brain and body elevates to mid and then when it reaches to high, the threshold for the neural sensation level that the body can tolerate is reached, and the neural electrical sensations are discharged by the high intensity sensations experienced during orgasm. If the body does not do this quickly, the brain and body nerves would later be too stimulated by the neural impulses and would face critical damage.

This failsafe has the same function as the ground breaker built in electrical fuses. It protects the fragile electronic equipment from high voltages that can damage the circuits and render it unusable.

These high intensity neural sensations with the feelings of tiredness "short-circuits" and terminate the horny thoughts in his mind, which is why he feels a lost of sexual interest right after he ejaculates.

By now he should be reminded of the need to drink water, and any further delay would badly dehydrate and damage the brain and body.

A person might choose to feel horny whenever he gets dehydrated, he chooses to use horny thoughts to overwrite the thoughts to replenish his body fluids, and resolves the sexual thoughts by ejaculation. Until next time when he gets dehydrated again, the whole process repeats itself.

But remember that every person's brain and body is different and may not dehydrate in a similar capacity. Most people also do not replace the urge to drink water with sexual thoughts, therefore not everybody would feel "horny" whenever they feel thirsty.

There are people who eat foods such as aphrodisiacs that causes the body to dehydrate in order to increase their sexual feelings. Such examples are foods that contain diuretics that leeches water from the body like coffee, chocolate and wine. Seafood with high sodium content that causes dehydration. Also foods that contain Monosodium-glutamate, of which Glutamate is a neural transmitter than affects brain functions.

There are also some people who choose to use sex drugs to facilitate this dehydration in the mind. Whicever way one chooses to dehydrate themselves, serious dehydration is a cause of irreversible brain damage that dulls mental functions.

Therefore the choice to feel horny or not is still very much a personal choice.

It is important to take the recommended number of glasses of water a day to keep the body's functions at normal operation. It is also important to remove the sodium chloride from the tongue by brushing it, to not do so is similar to constantly bombard the taste buds, just as one constantly listens to music or sees bright lights. Remember that the constant sensations from the taste buds of trapped sodium chloride to the brain is a very great distraction to the mind as well. So remember to give the taste buds and the mind a rest.