Why be gay?

This blog explains my views of homosexuality based strictly on a scientific and psychological perspective.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Homosexuality lies in a connection problem

This is an update of the factors that leads to homosexuality. I will refer from previous blog posts.

A young boy who does not have a good environment that allows him sufficient opportunities to connect and relate to the people around him would not gain the skills to socially relate to people when he grows up.

The young boy with his deficient social skills, would find it uneasy to communicate well with people and make friends. Deficient social skills can be seen in kids who could not connect well with their peers, even though they may talk alot but often talk out of topic. This may cause him to be neglected by his peers.

The young boy's need to connect with people is then suppressed until he grows up much later. His needs to connect with people may then develop into likings and crushes of his favourite peers. Some homosexuals realise their liking for other boys at a young age.

As the boy reaches puberty, his body changes and he could develop intense crushes on boys of his age. He may even develop sexual thoughts and fantasies of his crushes.

But the boy may still experience his deficient ability to communicate and to connect with people. His needs to connect with people may then turn into his sexual fantasies during masturbation in which he imagines close physical connections with his crushes. The boy may feel that it is the only possible way to connect with these people because he is unable to communicate and connect to them in real-life, he may be afraid to approach them to chat and to make friends, due to various reasons that instill nervousness in him.

As the boy grows up into a teenager, his needs to express himself may develop into other areas such as dressing and body language. He may even dye his hair and follow the many habits of his peers such as hanging out in streets and smoking, which does not improve one's social skills but dulls it.

Some homosexual teenagers who hang out with groups of friends may be able to talk fluently and may seem very expressive but very often the topics they talk about cannot be related or relevant to other people. They may be good in self-expression but poor in people-connecting skills. They often talk for the sake of relieving boredom instead of connecting with people. Teenagers who cannot connect well with their parents would often lead to misunderstandings and family quarrels.

Homosexual teenagers feel the great need to connect to another person and to share thoughts and feelings. They may get influenced by the social culture of Homosexuality, and they adopt themselves as homosexuals.

Homosexuals choose the same gender to relate to because they are more similar to themselves than the opposite gender, and therefore easier to connect with. They prefer the same gender as a more effective solace for their daily worries and threats to their Selves.

To be able to love requires one to connect to others with the mind. Homosexuals who are unable to do so due to deficient social skills may use physical sexual connections in order to connect with the person they like. But having a physical connection with another person does not mean he could know and understand the person through such a temporary connection. It takes time and patience to get to know a person well and to develop trust.

Homosexuals may see sexual behaviours as extreme forms of play. But animals who lack efficient ways to communicate with one another use physical body language and touch as a form to connect and communicate.

We see physical world wars where the failure to communicate and understand leads to physical fights. So is sexual behaviour a sign of the failure to communicate, which has to be resolved through touch and motion to release repressed emotions?

How well do people understand homosexuals even though they are so expressive? There is a great communication barrier.

Homosexuals may seem to be very expressive but their erratic emotions and impatience often get in the way in the face of logical reasoning. They often go out of point.

Homosexuals often find attractive people as safe and easily connectable people. But whether they could successfully make friends with them is another matter.

Homosexuals who seek to have long term boyfriends may just want a long term connection with a person. They just want to focus connecting with a person instead of many close friends.

Homosexuals often break up easily with their boyfriends because of the inability to maintain a long-term connection, due to deficient social skills or incompatible personalities. If two people cannot connect properly, there would definately be misunderstandings. It may be easy to connect physically with people but to connect mentally is not a fast and simple process, social skills has to be worked on.

Homosexuals who seek sexual intimacy to connect with other males may simply be using the connection as a temporary escape and relief from unwanted thoughts in their lives. Of course they could also play computer games and do hobbies for hours but I'm sure people are much more interesting, livelier and more interactive than the inanimate and lonely computer.

2 Comments:

At 8:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Homosexuals who seek sexual intimacy to connect with other males may simply be using the connection as a temporary escape and relief from unwanted thoughts in their lives."

You must be naive if you think that gay teens do not suffer from emotional distress at their being gay, thanks to the prevalent homophobia. I doubt that provides any sort of relief. Many would trade in their homosexuality for a host of other problems, until they eventually come to terms with the former.

 
At 10:59 PM, Blogger ? said...

What better way to escape the emotional distress by sinking deeper into Homosexuality?

 

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